Life is a wonderful gift! However, life can also be really hard and quite challenging in certain seasons too. Everybody has their own life stories and pain that they may carry which has shaped them.

I thought it may be helpful to let you know a little of my journey.

Why I visited a counsellor for the first time.

For me personally, I was brought up to deal with things privately and to turn to God as the one to help me. This was okay for a while, but I reached a point in my life in 2009 where I had moved interstate, was newly married, my parents and siblings then moved overseas and I got quite sick requiring in depth surgery. I was not living the life I had pictured and I was lost. I had my faith, but I was also feeling really isolated (I was actually depressed and didn’t realise it) and I needed someone I could personally talk to and process with. So I took a deep breath, pushed aside the negative thoughts around speaking with someone outside of my family and booked in my first counselling session. I found the session very helpful and was glad to have the opportunity to share what I was going through in a safe and confidential space.

Since then I have seen a few different counsellors and/or psychologists to process complex trauma and PTSD from various things that have happened in my life. It has taken time, hard work, and reflection to move towards healing. My personal sessions gave me clarity, challenged my way of thinking, provided better processing and coping skills, and helped me deal with some difficult things.

Why did I choose to become a qualified counsellor?

Since the year 2000, I have been a singer and vocal coach with my business “Joy is in the House School of Music”. In that time I have worked with hundreds of vocal clients around the world and find often in coaching sessions, clients need to delve into what is holding them back mentally onstage or in the studio with their voice/performance. Through our vocal sessions, I have had the privilege of helping them get the vocal breakthrough they were wanting leading to greater singing freedom and more authentic performing and recording.

Due to the desire to understand how to help my vocal clients more, and to also help others who don’t sing/perform, I decided to study Counselling, which I enjoyed and learned so much from that I will soon be undertaking even further studies in counselling.

Go the Flow Counselling has been created with the hope of making your life easier through counselling - to provide you with a safe space to feel heard and valued; a place to take the steps you want towards facing the issues weighing on you, so that you can live your life in a way you find fulfilling.

What life experience have I had?

• I have lived in many different countries and attended 13 different schools as a youth. I understand the anxiety around meeting new people and being the ‘new, tall, different-coloured girl’ again and again, not speaking the native language, and re-integrating again after living overseas and learning about other ethnicities and cultures.

• I am of mixed heritage (Nigerian and Australian) and experienced the complexities of not really fitting into either culture, but the joy we found in creating our own unique family culture, which I am grateful my parents did very well.

• I have sung throughout Australia, the US, Virgin Islands, Paris, Brunei, Singapore and Vanuatu and understand the pressures of performing and working through nervousness to connect with your audiences in a meaningful way.

• I’ve experienced chronic pain from severe Endometriosis (Endo) for 30+ years now. I have had many surgeries and tried alternative therapies to try to deal with it. Endo caused infertility and miscarriage taking 8 years of loss in trying to get our beautiful daughter to the earth. Endo has caused me to question my identity and role as a woman. Irrespective, I understand what it is to push through each day in debilitating pain and the silent mental toll this can take on a person when there is seemingly no end in sight.

• In my early 20’s, I lost my dear friend Jess to cancer. She had that ‘walk into a room and everyone wanted to be friends with her’ kind of energy. Jess was fierce, smart, beautiful, loyal and kind. Journeying cancer with her and her family to ultimately losing her, changed me in ways I can never explain.

• I understand religious and spiritual abuse, having been under narcissistic and gaslighting leadership from a church I worked in. Seeing a counsellor helped me through.

• As mentioned, I am a singer and vocal coach (www.joyisinthehouseschoolofmusic.com) and have walked with many vocal clients through their own pain, bereavement, and making hard life choices to pursue music. I have also had the privilege of sharing in their highs of successful recording contracts, tours, etc., and the joy of celebrating all of their hard work.

Why do I share all of this?

To give you an insight into my life experience, to show you that I am not perfect and have my own struggles. To let you know I have met and walked with people from many countries and all sorts of complex backgrounds.

I share to let you know you are not alone in your journey and that it would be my privilege to partner with you in finding peace, healing, purpose, solutions, and in helping you take steps towards an enriched and fulfilling life.

All the love and blessings,

Ayo